R is for Reptilians

The Reptilian Agenda 3 DVD Set - Credo Mutwa & David IckeWe live in the so called 'enlightened' era. It's the 21st century now and we are just a few short steps away from putting a man on Mars. We're looking at travelling to other stars or, at the very least, at finding better and clearer ways ways to look at them so it may come as a surprise to some of you to learn that, in this 'enlightened' age, there remains a contingent of the human population who actually believe that our planet is infested with alien creatures known as reptilians

According to David Icke, the creator of the reptilian legend, these reptilians came to us from the constellation of 'Draco'. It is not said exactly which star in this system they originated from nor how they came to spontaneously exist as a unified race over such a gargantuan area but it is told that, at some point, they took up residence in a series of tunnels beneath the surface of the earth and have been manipulating mankind since the dawn of civilisation under the auspices of an organisation named the 'Babylonian Brotherhood'. Exactly why and how the reptilians have gone about doing this is unclear. Presumably the reptilians wish to enslave us or perhaps were provide them with a self perpetuating source of tasty snacks. Whatever their motivations the reptilians have pursued them by occupying all the positions of power in our world through interbreeding with humans and, occasionally, eating kittens.

Reptilians conveniently combine all the traits that are so compellingly repulsive in popular mythology. They include elements of the perenially popular dragon and vampire myths and are apparently able to change their shape at will, adding to their fascination and mystique as well as explaining why none of you will have seen anything on CNN about the Earth being invaded by 'lizard people'. They are also conveniently inter-dimensional creatures and capable of deflecting any awkward technical questions by invoking this power which makes them remarkable well suited to politics.
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Pundits of the reptilian conspiracy to enslave mankind claim that reptilians have permeated almost every aspect of human society and culture by parasitically inhabiting the forms of a variety of influential people ranging in importance and influence from Queen Elizabeth II to Kris Kristofferson. This may come as a shock to those of you who have seen the movie 'Convoy', I for one will never be able to watch it again without wondering if 'Rubber Duck' was some kind of obscure code-word for the commencement of the Babylonian Brotherhoods' undoubtedly nefarious yet entirely obscure designs for the future of our world.

Jimmy Blonde is a science fiction writer with an understandable interest in UFOs. The only problem is we're never quite sure when he's kidding. He also wonders where all the rum's gone...

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